Holiday Harmony

What do the upcoming holidays mean for you?

At this time of year, there is a special energy in the air around the holiday season that we can tap into.  You either love this time of year, and look forward to it, or it can be a difficult, stressful, and traumatic time.

Often, we fall into the trap of doing the same things every year because that is the way we’ve always done it, regardless of whether we’ve actually enjoyed those things.  We may find ourselves spending this time with people we don’t really want to be with, or keeping busy with preparations for experiences that don’t feed our being.

Tapping into the energy of this time of year can create a positive shift in your life:

Start with a blank slate:  If you could do anything for the upcoming holiday, how would you ideally spend this time – what would bring you joy and satisfaction?  Make a list, then see how much of your ideal day can be implemented. 

Enlist your tribe:  Most people do the same things for the holidays every year because they are used to doing this.  Give yourself and theHoliday Harmony on a green background and a brown table in front. On the table, are 3 black stones with the words harmony, balance, well-being, and a colorful butterfly perched on top. A pink flower leans against the stones. people you love, permission to step into new adventures and experiences.  Life is meant to be enjoyed – going through the motions of the holiday does not bring joy.  The people who celebrate with you, will surprise you in wonderful ways when you give them permission to do something different.  At the very least, they will realize, as they experience something new, how much they miss out on by sticking to the old.

Be conscious about your well-being: You matter most in your own life.  Be aware that you are getting the rest you need, eating food that you choose with care, and taking time to give back to yourself mentally, emotionally, spiritually and physically.  If we don’t care for ourselves first, we will find ourselves depleted, and this ripples out to everyone in our circles.

Let go of perfection and the stress that goes with it:  You don’t need to have every moment of the day be perfect.  Aim for creating a day of joy and let that become your main focus. Perfection is unattainable and will only leave you exhausted and miserable.  Some of our best memories are the beautiful, imperfect moments that were filled with laughter and joy.

Give yourself permission to let go of the expectation of others: Often we do things because other people expect us to, and we don’t consider the implications – giving in to others’ wishes, against our own wishes, takes away from ourselves.  We give other people more value and importance in our lives than we give ourselves.  I invite you to say no to those things that you really do not want to do, and to say yes to yourself.   Spend time only with those people who bring you joy.  Choosing who you spend time with can be uncomfortable at first, since those you are usually with, will expect you to be there, and may make you feel bad about your choice.  Ask yourself what your being needs, and if it is not those people, be with the tribe you choose that fills you with joy.

This holiday season, give to yourself as much as you give to others.  Choose joy over perfection, and fun over expectation.  You matter – put yourself first on your holiday list, and start from there.

What are you doing for yourself this holiday season? Share in the comments.

Many Blessings,



This debut memoir chronicles a woman’s spiritual exploration and growth as she overcame a disturbing childhood and helped others heal.

Brought to America from the Dominican Republic as a youngster, Molina-Marshall should have led a happy life. Her father was a diligent worker, and his large family wanted for nothing. But the author recounts that her dad had a drinking problem and was a serial philanderer. Molina-Marshall’s long-suffering mother left him for a woman. Then it was all downhill for the bright, 12-year-old girl, who was shuttled between foster care and relatives. According to the author, she was sexually abused by the husband of one of her siblings. This resulted in Molina-Marshall becoming alienated and moody. By 15, she simply tried to survive. In her favor were grit and a restless intelligence. She quit school, rented a room, and found a factory job. Time went by, and for a while she was happily married. Yet when her husband left her, her life truly began. She turned to religion for answers but decided that blaming God for her woes was a cop-out. 

In this absorbing and moving memoir, Molina-Marshall’s vivid storytelling is fearless. She frankly discusses the truths she discovered and the indignities she suffered. These admissions are disclosed with a touch of resignation and plenty of bite. However painful, everything she experienced was a lesson, and she bravely realized that she was part of the problem: “The fear of being hurt, rejected, or abused often led to me feeling lonely and misunderstood. No one knew the agonizing pain I felt being trapped in my thoughts and anger. I was becoming my biggest threat.” 

The author skillfully recounts her intricate spiritual journey. To deal with her psychic wounds, she searched for an inspirational system. Her open-mindedness led her to the interfaith concept—cherry-picking from various religions and spiritual movements, yoga, and Indigenous beliefs as a way of finding peace. Along with her female partner, she built a therapy practice, making use of every spiritual element that aided her and others. The road was bumpy, and she found that women of color in same-sex relationships were not welcomed everywhere. To do good works—and finally live on her own terms—she effectively overcame bigotry.

An engrossing, cathartic account of empathy and success through determination and confidence.

Pub Date: May 3, 2022   |    ISBN: 978-0-578-38315-6  |   Page Count: 264    | Publisher: From Trauma to Triumph  |   Review Posted Online: June 13, 2022