Celebrate the most important factor in your world…

This time of year we are constantly reminded about the spirit of giving.   Whether you celebrate this period or not, the spirit of the season has the same energy globally – things are festive, bright, cheerful and busy. 

As much as this time of year is about giving, and for most of us we think of giving as giving to others, we need to give to ourselves too.  Equally important, we need to be able to receive.  We are as deserving to receive as any other person we give to.   There are so many expectations about who we should be, how we should feel, who we must spend time with, and what we are supposed to do at this time.   

While we are celebrating, celebrate the most important factor in your world – YOU.

  • You deserve to be loved
  • You deserve to choose who you want to spend your precious time on earth with
  • You deserve to decide what actions you will spend time on
  • And most of all you deserve to have your voice heard, your truths shared and your desires met. 
  • Your voice is the most important one and the only one that truly matters for you.

We all have things in our lives that do not serve us – whether it is a tradition, a person, or someone’s expectation.  If it does Do what makes you happynot bring you joy, if it does not make you feel happy, then let it go.  Don’t wait for someone else to give you permission to release anything in your life that no longer serves you. Give yourself permission to let go; to not live according to the expectations of others. 

Show yourself the love that you show others.  Show yourself the kindness you show others.  Most of all, celebrate and nurture yourself as you do others.

In loving ourselves, we get to choose who we allow in our space and what our boundaries are.  It is our right to determine how we feel about a person, a tradition, and the way we spend this time of year. We get to choose what is welcome from others and what we will not accept.  Choose you.  Choose your happiness, well-being, and peace.  Choose to spend time with people who support you and make you happy. 

The expectations may be for you to show up in a certain place or spend time with certain people, but you are worthy of giving yourself the love you give to others by choosing who you want to be around and who you will let into your emotional space.  Family are the people who you choose to call family, the people who support you unconditionally, love you no matter what, and you can count on them to be there for you.  You are worthy and never need to compromise who you are at your core to please others.  Value yourself as you would a dear friend, and give yourself permission to choose.

  • Find a quiet, comfortable spot, close your eyes and take a few deep breaths.  
  • See yourself as a separate person standing before you , as if they were a dear friend. 
  • Look into those beautiful eyes, and talk to that person before you. 
  • Tell them you forgive them.  Tell them how loved they are.  Tell them that they need never earn that love – it is always there.  Tell them that their thoughts, feelings and deepest desires matter.  Tell them they can choose – they can put themselves first in their own life and they deserve to live according their own truths.  Tell them anything you need to hear right now. Perhaps even write this down in a letter to yourself.   
  • Allow this process to release anything that no longer serves you.  This is your space to communicate with yourself, uncover your truths, and open yourself to new beginnings. 
  • It is your right to live your life according to your deepest truths.

What gift will you be giving yourself this holiday season?  Share in the comments below.

Many Blessings




This debut memoir chronicles a woman’s spiritual exploration and growth as she overcame a disturbing childhood and helped others heal.

Brought to America from the Dominican Republic as a youngster, Molina-Marshall should have led a happy life. Her father was a diligent worker, and his large family wanted for nothing. But the author recounts that her dad had a drinking problem and was a serial philanderer. Molina-Marshall’s long-suffering mother left him for a woman. Then it was all downhill for the bright, 12-year-old girl, who was shuttled between foster care and relatives. According to the author, she was sexually abused by the husband of one of her siblings. This resulted in Molina-Marshall becoming alienated and moody. By 15, she simply tried to survive. In her favor were grit and a restless intelligence. She quit school, rented a room, and found a factory job. Time went by, and for a while she was happily married. Yet when her husband left her, her life truly began. She turned to religion for answers but decided that blaming God for her woes was a cop-out. 

In this absorbing and moving memoir, Molina-Marshall’s vivid storytelling is fearless. She frankly discusses the truths she discovered and the indignities she suffered. These admissions are disclosed with a touch of resignation and plenty of bite. However painful, everything she experienced was a lesson, and she bravely realized that she was part of the problem: “The fear of being hurt, rejected, or abused often led to me feeling lonely and misunderstood. No one knew the agonizing pain I felt being trapped in my thoughts and anger. I was becoming my biggest threat.” 

The author skillfully recounts her intricate spiritual journey. To deal with her psychic wounds, she searched for an inspirational system. Her open-mindedness led her to the interfaith concept—cherry-picking from various religions and spiritual movements, yoga, and Indigenous beliefs as a way of finding peace. Along with her female partner, she built a therapy practice, making use of every spiritual element that aided her and others. The road was bumpy, and she found that women of color in same-sex relationships were not welcomed everywhere. To do good works—and finally live on her own terms—she effectively overcame bigotry.

An engrossing, cathartic account of empathy and success through determination and confidence.

Pub Date: May 3, 2022   |    ISBN: 978-0-578-38315-6  |   Page Count: 264    | Publisher: From Trauma to Triumph  |   Review Posted Online: June 13, 2022