Say YES to Yourself

We are three weeks into the new year and likely settling into a routine.  Perhaps you have managed to implement some of your New Year’s wishes, perhaps not.   This is the time we usually fall into the routines we had in place.  You may have started off well and added that exercise routine or changed your diet, and maybe you have managed to stick with it.

When we are asked by a loved one or friend to help with something we have not planned for, we usually say yes if we are able to help.  Even knowing we did not plan to do that task, we will say yes because we care and want to support that person.  Many of us find it easier to say yes to others than ourselves.  If you were to  think of taking the same slot of time for yourself, to do something luxurious or practice self-care, you would likely feel that you could not spare the time.  I challenge you to say YES to yourself. 

In choosing to say YES to yourself, you put yourself first in your life. You feel better and are able to see the future you desire, then create it.  We have been taught that saying yes to ourselves and putting ourselves first is selfish, hence it is easier to doYes you can - say yes to yourself something for someone else than to do the same thing for yourself.  However, when you choose YOU first, you step into who you are and are able to function at your best. When you are functioning at your best, everyone around you is the recipient of your well-being. 

To change the path you are on, or build the future you envision, you need to be an active participant in your life.  Instead of allowing yourself to go where you are led, choose the path and create each day for yourself. Consciously give time to the list of wishes you created for this year, even if all you can give to yourself is five minutes.  Ask yourself, “If someone dear to me asked me to do this for them, would I be able to find the time?“ If the answer is yes, create that time for yourself.

We decide the value of each task and activity that fills our day.  We attach a measure of significance to those things we feel we must do and also decide what we can easily let go of.  Since you get to decide what holds importance for you, you can choose what to include in your life, to shift you to where you want to be.  When you value what matters to you, so do the people who love you. Even if it takes a moment for them to come around, those who love and support you will see the value that your personal choices  add to your well-being.  Soon they will help you in making it part of your life.   Say YES to at least one thing that matters to you each day, whether it is listening to a podcast, reading something, creating a vision board to look at each day, or just sitting quietly in meditation.  Choose YOU this year and watch life choose you back!

What are you doing today to say YES to yourself? Share and inspire others.

Many Blessings,
Santa

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This debut memoir chronicles a woman’s spiritual exploration and growth as she overcame a disturbing childhood and helped others heal.

Brought to America from the Dominican Republic as a youngster, Molina-Marshall should have led a happy life. Her father was a diligent worker, and his large family wanted for nothing. But the author recounts that her dad had a drinking problem and was a serial philanderer. Molina-Marshall’s long-suffering mother left him for a woman. Then it was all downhill for the bright, 12-year-old girl, who was shuttled between foster care and relatives. According to the author, she was sexually abused by the husband of one of her siblings. This resulted in Molina-Marshall becoming alienated and moody. By 15, she simply tried to survive. In her favor were grit and a restless intelligence. She quit school, rented a room, and found a factory job. Time went by, and for a while she was happily married. Yet when her husband left her, her life truly began. She turned to religion for answers but decided that blaming God for her woes was a cop-out. 

In this absorbing and moving memoir, Molina-Marshall’s vivid storytelling is fearless. She frankly discusses the truths she discovered and the indignities she suffered. These admissions are disclosed with a touch of resignation and plenty of bite. However painful, everything she experienced was a lesson, and she bravely realized that she was part of the problem: “The fear of being hurt, rejected, or abused often led to me feeling lonely and misunderstood. No one knew the agonizing pain I felt being trapped in my thoughts and anger. I was becoming my biggest threat.” 

The author skillfully recounts her intricate spiritual journey. To deal with her psychic wounds, she searched for an inspirational system. Her open-mindedness led her to the interfaith concept—cherry-picking from various religions and spiritual movements, yoga, and Indigenous beliefs as a way of finding peace. Along with her female partner, she built a therapy practice, making use of every spiritual element that aided her and others. The road was bumpy, and she found that women of color in same-sex relationships were not welcomed everywhere. To do good works—and finally live on her own terms—she effectively overcame bigotry.

An engrossing, cathartic account of empathy and success through determination and confidence.

Pub Date: May 3, 2022   |    ISBN: 978-0-578-38315-6  |   Page Count: 264    | Publisher: From Trauma to Triumph  |   Review Posted Online: June 13, 2022