Breathe and Be

As we move into the holiday season, for many of us, it brings up emotions and frantic energy. We may find ourselves accepting the expectations of others about what this time of year should be, and this puts additional pressure on us.

Most of us already have a list of tasks that need completing, events we will be attending, things that need to be done for the holiday period, and even gatherings we are expected to host. Often the things on this list are from old habits and we are doing them because that is what we always do. They bring up the same emotions and reactions in us.  If you have crafted this time of year, you may feel fortunate, but if you have not, you may feel pressurized and perhaps even a little resentful and frustrated.You are never alone; breath is always with you

Sometimes you don’t have someone to celebrate with or you may not feel like celebrating at all. The expectation that you should celebrate, can be overwhelming.  This can be a time to start a new tradition or way of being – you can create something new instead of feeling obligated to celebrate in a certain way because of  external expectations.

Remind yourself that you are the most important person in your life. If you feel out of control, this spills over onto everyone else around you. Connect with your being and create a holiday season that feels free, joyful and happy – a time designed by you, for you.

Write it down:

We hold so much inside our heads, from our to-do lists, moments and experiences that weigh us down. Writing things down can remove them from our minds and release them onto paper. If it is on your to-do list, having it written down gives you the peace of mind that you won’t forget something. It also removes a little pressure since, by looking at it, you can then decide what is urgent, what is important, and what can be deferred.

Check in with self:

As we grow and heal, the things that are important to us change. Check in with yourself and decide what your holiday season needs to be this year to feed your soul. What do you still want on your list? What is it time to let go of that no longer serves you or feeds your being? What expectations have you placed on yourself that you don’t need to fulfil? What are the expectations of others that you do not care for and can let go of? Have you asked your loved ones if the things you do as a family, that you may. Highlighted not sure why an outer space not want to do, are important to them? Or are you simply assuming that these things matter to them?

The one tool you always have within reach:

The tool you always have with you is your body. Whenever you feel overwhelmed or you find your emotions headed in a negative direction, use this exercise:

Be in a safe space where you can let go – it can even be your car if you are not home. Place your fingers on your pulse on your wrist, close your eyes and listen to your heartbeat. Allow yourself to float into the steady rhythm of your heart. As you do this, begin to take deep breaths, deepening your breathing with each inhale and exhale. Lose yourself in this space of serenity. In this quiet space, connect to Source/God/Universe – visualize Divine light washing over you and carrying away the heaviness. Feel the energy of this through your body. Open your eyes and, from this space, continue what you were doing.

Create a holiday season that feeds your being. What one thing are you doing just for you this time of year?

Many Blessings,

Santa

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This debut memoir chronicles a woman’s spiritual exploration and growth as she overcame a disturbing childhood and helped others heal.

Brought to America from the Dominican Republic as a youngster, Molina-Marshall should have led a happy life. Her father was a diligent worker, and his large family wanted for nothing. But the author recounts that her dad had a drinking problem and was a serial philanderer. Molina-Marshall’s long-suffering mother left him for a woman. Then it was all downhill for the bright, 12-year-old girl, who was shuttled between foster care and relatives. According to the author, she was sexually abused by the husband of one of her siblings. This resulted in Molina-Marshall becoming alienated and moody. By 15, she simply tried to survive. In her favor were grit and a restless intelligence. She quit school, rented a room, and found a factory job. Time went by, and for a while she was happily married. Yet when her husband left her, her life truly began. She turned to religion for answers but decided that blaming God for her woes was a cop-out. 

In this absorbing and moving memoir, Molina-Marshall’s vivid storytelling is fearless. She frankly discusses the truths she discovered and the indignities she suffered. These admissions are disclosed with a touch of resignation and plenty of bite. However painful, everything she experienced was a lesson, and she bravely realized that she was part of the problem: “The fear of being hurt, rejected, or abused often led to me feeling lonely and misunderstood. No one knew the agonizing pain I felt being trapped in my thoughts and anger. I was becoming my biggest threat.” 

The author skillfully recounts her intricate spiritual journey. To deal with her psychic wounds, she searched for an inspirational system. Her open-mindedness led her to the interfaith concept—cherry-picking from various religions and spiritual movements, yoga, and Indigenous beliefs as a way of finding peace. Along with her female partner, she built a therapy practice, making use of every spiritual element that aided her and others. The road was bumpy, and she found that women of color in same-sex relationships were not welcomed everywhere. To do good works—and finally live on her own terms—she effectively overcame bigotry.

An engrossing, cathartic account of empathy and success through determination and confidence.

Pub Date: May 3, 2022   |    ISBN: 978-0-578-38315-6  |   Page Count: 264    | Publisher: From Trauma to Triumph  |   Review Posted Online: June 13, 2022