Choose your Reality

We are taught from a young age to acknowledge and own the limitations we perceive as true – those about ourselves personally, and the limitations of a given environment. We are given parameters about who we can be, based on what the adults in our lives perceive as true about us.  We often unconsciously internalize these beliefs.  For example, if as a child, you heard that you were not good at sport because you always did poorly in the sport that was offered, this may have translated to a belief that you cannot successfully participate in sport.   In the greater world, if you hold the belief you need to follow a specific path to get to a certain level in your career, you end up waiting for a promotion to get to where you want to be.   You defer to external circumstances.

Something is only true if we believe it to be true.  We learn that reality controls our life, and only what we can see is true.   The fact is our reality begins from within.  We have the power to create our external reality. 

If we shed the old programming of what we believe to be true or what we see as reality as being the only possible path, then theLeft side is a green tree with green grass, on the right, a bare winter tree with cracked dry ground. A note with the words true and false and the option to check the box sits in front. world opens up for us.  If we’ve grown up in tough circumstances and we believe that we need to have certain resources or opportunities available before things can change for the better, then we remain in that environment.  If, however, we change our belief to possibility, and know that we are not dependent on something external to change before we can have a better life, we create the space for a better life to happen.  Everything we need for that next step comes our way.  Our default programming is usually that we must first know how we can get there before we can believe that we can do or have it – we look at where we are, and then all the paths we think can get us to where we want to be, based on our current situation.  This limits us – the paths we can see are the ones that we know about and based on our beliefs, think are open to us, but there are many ways we may get there that we do not yet know about.

Opportunity rises to meet our beliefs where they are.   The only limits in our lives that will stop us, are the ones we turn into beliefs.  Our beliefs are created from the thoughts we think.   Once we shift our thoughts, we get to choose what is actually true for us.  For example, reality says that others in a specific situation had a certain experience, therefore that is the way things work.  When we shift this thinking, we can choose if this is really true for us.  Check in with yourself and let the wisdom guide you.

Here is a starting point to shift your thoughts to creative instead of reactive:
  • Just because it is true for someone else, it does not have to be true for me.   
  • My path is my own and I get to choose my version of reality.  
  • I have everything I need within me to take the next step.
  • I can forge my own path and it can be easy.

Choose what is true for you and you get to create the reality you want.

What thoughts are you shifting?  Join us as we explore this further.

Many Blessings



This debut memoir chronicles a woman’s spiritual exploration and growth as she overcame a disturbing childhood and helped others heal.

Brought to America from the Dominican Republic as a youngster, Molina-Marshall should have led a happy life. Her father was a diligent worker, and his large family wanted for nothing. But the author recounts that her dad had a drinking problem and was a serial philanderer. Molina-Marshall’s long-suffering mother left him for a woman. Then it was all downhill for the bright, 12-year-old girl, who was shuttled between foster care and relatives. According to the author, she was sexually abused by the husband of one of her siblings. This resulted in Molina-Marshall becoming alienated and moody. By 15, she simply tried to survive. In her favor were grit and a restless intelligence. She quit school, rented a room, and found a factory job. Time went by, and for a while she was happily married. Yet when her husband left her, her life truly began. She turned to religion for answers but decided that blaming God for her woes was a cop-out. 

In this absorbing and moving memoir, Molina-Marshall’s vivid storytelling is fearless. She frankly discusses the truths she discovered and the indignities she suffered. These admissions are disclosed with a touch of resignation and plenty of bite. However painful, everything she experienced was a lesson, and she bravely realized that she was part of the problem: “The fear of being hurt, rejected, or abused often led to me feeling lonely and misunderstood. No one knew the agonizing pain I felt being trapped in my thoughts and anger. I was becoming my biggest threat.” 

The author skillfully recounts her intricate spiritual journey. To deal with her psychic wounds, she searched for an inspirational system. Her open-mindedness led her to the interfaith concept—cherry-picking from various religions and spiritual movements, yoga, and Indigenous beliefs as a way of finding peace. Along with her female partner, she built a therapy practice, making use of every spiritual element that aided her and others. The road was bumpy, and she found that women of color in same-sex relationships were not welcomed everywhere. To do good works—and finally live on her own terms—she effectively overcame bigotry.

An engrossing, cathartic account of empathy and success through determination and confidence.

Pub Date: May 3, 2022   |    ISBN: 978-0-578-38315-6  |   Page Count: 264    | Publisher: From Trauma to Triumph  |   Review Posted Online: June 13, 2022