Going through trauma changes us. To survive difficult experiences, we develop coping mechanisms and habits that we incorporate into our being. This becomes part of who we are and what we think is possible for ourselves.
In a basic example, if you break your arm, you have a period where you can no longer use that arm while it heals, so you teach yourself to compensate with your other arm and different parts of your body to get things done. When the broken arm is healed, you may find there are times when you are still not using that arm until you remind yourself that you can.
In the same way, when we have been through trauma, we have taught ourselves what was safe and what was not safe; what we could do and what we were not able to do; what was open for us and what we needed to avoid. We developed habits and behaviors that served us at that
time. As we heal and grow, we need to check and see if those habits and behaviors are still serving us or if they have become limitations instead.
As humans, we are constantly creating habits. Sometimes these habits are intentional, but often they are born from a situation, and we may not even be aware that we have been practicing them. The lessons we learn – those that we are aware of and those we’re not conscious of – shape our habits.
As we walk our paths of healing, we need to revisit our beliefs, habit and behaviors.
Check in with yourself:
- Take notice of what you are saying yes to and what you are saying no to. Is there something that you really want to be, do or have, but are not going for it? If so, is this a limit that exists because of a past experience?
- Become aware of the thoughts you think. Pay attention to the words you use about yourself – both out loud and in your thoughts. Do you find yourself limiting your opportunities through your thoughts? Maybe a job opportunity appears that you would really like to go for, yet you are thinking that you won’t get selected for it. The thought becomes your limit, and you don’t even try to go for the opportunity. Does this thought come from a similar past experience?
- Take notice of the words the people you are most often around, use to describe you. Are they supportive and kind? Do the people you consider your inner circle believe in you? Are you holding limiting beliefs that came from their words? Has the external input become a limitation in your life? If so, it’s time to change this.
Becoming aware of the ways we may be limiting ourselves, frees us to claim the life we desire.
How are you unconsciously limiting yourself and what are you doing to change this?
Many Blessings,
Santa
